Have you always been the fixer in your family? Always the "good" one in every relationship? Let.it.go, friend. I teach my students about pre-birth planning. One of the things I really stress is that we each have our own journey. We planned these journeys in order to learn very specific lessons here in Earth School. As such, we also learn to honor each other's journey. Part of YOUR specific journey is learning to allow others to have their own. When you are the "fixer" or the "good" one, you are doing more than living up to someone else's criteria, you are actually interfering in other's journeys. Say what? Yes. It's true.
One of the most freeing concepts I have learned is that someone else's journey is not mine! I use this concept a lot. When someone in my family starts pressuring me to fix somebody else, I easily reply, "It's not my journey." You see, the most important thing I signed up for (after getting my children raised), was learning my own lessons. As an adult, it's time to realize that you do not have to continue to live for everyone else. It's time to get to know the real you. There is so much to unlearn as you are doing this.
We all get caught up in birth order. It affects how we grow up and the way we were raised but you are an adult now. It doesn't have to affect you anymore. We all get caught up in each of our roles as we grow. I have been daughter, sister, granddaughter, wife, mother, grandmother, medium, teacher, leader, organizer, seeker but I am SO much more than every one of these roles. There are many who will guilt you into thinking you need to stay in your "assigned" roles but I encourage you to closely examine those roles and the people who are so uncomfortable. The ones who really love you will stay. Those roles I just mentioned, how do you like them? If they suit you and you are happy, great! If you have outgrown them and are ready to have more freedom and move on, shed them.
One of the greatest gifts God gives to us is allowing us to grow until we die! This is so exciting to me! I challenge myself on a regular basis to continue to reinvent myself. Let me tell you, it seems to make my grown children very uncomfortable sometimes but I believe I am giving them an example to live by. I know my legacy will be one of love and tolerance. Surely that will rub off on those most important to me!
I have vowed to be true to myself. This made a great many people uncomfortable as I came out publicly as a Medium. It made more uncomfortable as I do not take a step back on my values or how I believe. I don't worry anymore about someone else's comfort. Yes, I am tactful but, more important, I am authentically imperfectly me!
I would challenge you today to reevaluate your life. Is it going where you want it to go? If it is, I could not be happier for you! If it's not, what do you need to change in order to live authentically for yourself? Be honest in this exercise. How do you want to move forward? It may mean a change in many relationships. That can be brutal but it can also be a great gift! Holes will be filled with those who resonate with who you really are! Don't be complacent in your life, mildly accepting roles that were handed to you by someone else.
I wish you joy in this journey, it is not for the faint-hearted, but I truly believe the Universe responds to those who seek. Perhaps your newest role might turn out to be one of Seeker as well!
If you are trying to grow spiritually, keep in mind that I offer classes and mentoring programs. I would love to help you move forward in your journey!